I’m taking a bit of a leap with this blog
post. I’m not going to re-read and agonise over it before it’s published. It’s
scary, but sort of liberating too. Here goes…
*
This week, I’ve been taking a break.
From what or whom, you might ask.
I’ve been taking a break…
…from myself.
And boy is it a relief.
New things are
exciting again. I let myself play with ideas that crop up in my head, unrelated
to what-I-am-supposed-to-be-doing (what is
that anyway?). And I feel like I can finally breathe once more. I’ve realized
I’m a bit of a slave-driver. I don’t say that with any hint of pride in my
voice at all. Being unkind to anyone (oneself or other people) is not
nice. And if you’re being
calculating about it, it ain’t productive either. Ultimately, I suspect, you’d
end up killing any connection that person has with anything beautiful in this
Universe.
What does this have to do with food?
Nothing. But everything. Anyone who has tried to grow anything will probably know
what I’m talking about. Roses? Cucumbers? Since when did treating that thing
badly get you the results you wanted? But treating it kindly and giving it the
conditions it needs will usually make it achieve its potential. I’ve been
thinking that the same applies to cooking. When I cook in a hurry, with no
attention being paid to what I’m chopping or stirring, it turns out bland,
unbalanced, shapeless. That’s no surprise, I realize when I’m eating it,
because it’s unloved. Giving it time, listening to my instinct about what it
needs, feeling warmth flowing through my hands, that’s when it works. Does this
happen to you?
If we know this about growing food, cooking
food and serving it, why are so many of us tuned into thinking that it’s ok to
be unkind to our selves? ‘No pain, no gain’ ringing any bells?
(For the avoidance of doubt, I’m not
endorsing, for example, letting go and eating the entire bag of chips. I
suspect that over-indulging in unhealthful things, or even over-eating
healthful things, is actually one of the ways of being unkind. It’s not
entirely unlike self-flagellation, to punish yourself for something else that
didn’t go right…)
Why are we sometimes somehow deemed more worthy when we box ourselves up (or agree to let
others box us up) into situations which, if we asked the question to the voice
really deep inside, we wouldn’t want to be in?
Just something that’s been going through my
mind today, and I wanted to share it with all of you, because I know some
really thoughtful peeps are reading this blog. I would love to know what you
think.
Love
Truffle
4 comments:
You've certainly given me food for thought! It's true, though, everything grows with love, so loving ourselves should be the first thing that we do. Let's try that, shall we?
I find it easier to be my own worst critic than my own best friend. So tricky to follow that wise inner voice, because - unlike a critic - it speaks so damned softly.
R, you are right. Someone ought to give all of our inner voices a mic and amp it up!
Love
Truffle
That's a really good point. About kindness to ourselves and ESP about cooking. Was talking to an old friend about how I have stopped cooking. I used to live to cook and bake but stopped. I guess I felt alone and rejected with no one to share it with since my usual dinner companion became the computer and another season of West Wing, the series. Without anyone to eat with on a regular basis, cooking became less enjoyable. Abit like showing love and getting rejected. Your defenses build up.
At the moment, there is too much going on. But one day. Thanks for the reminder!!
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